What nobody told me about my freshman year of college

Being back on campus is great. I love reuniting with friends and settling back into my routine of classes and church and everything else. I love being in Austin.

And as I sit here and rejoice in my surroundings, I can't help but think about just how different they were this time last year. I remember the feelings of loneliness, of inadequacy, of fear and failure all too well. I remember thinking that no one warned me that college was going to be hard, but also believing the lie that I was the only one that felt this way.

That's why I'm not only remembering my first semester of school and praising God for what He did in and through me then, but I'm sharing it because I know now that isolation is one of Satan's favorite weapons to use against us. He will take the smallest foothold and latch on, until all we hear is the lies he is feeding us.

Here are some of the lies I was believing my freshman year (these are actual quotes from my journal):

• Everyone is having a great time except for me
• I feel like I don't have any friends, college is hard and not very fun, and I can't talk to anyone about it
• I'm yearning to be known, to find someplace or something that feels like home and I just can't

So maybe you're feeling some of these things, whether or not you're a freshman in college. And I'm here to tell you that you are not alone. And that's comforting, it really is. But it isn't life giving. So here's some real Truth to combat those lies.

• Everyone is having a great time except for me

Ecclesiastes 1:9 "What has been is what will be, and what has been done is what will be done, and there is nothing new under the sun."

For as long as college has been around, college freshmen have felt lonely. I promise. All it takes is being honest with someone and encouraging them to be honest with you, and you will find that you are not alone.

• I feel like I don't have any friends, college is hard and not very fun, and I can't talk to anyone about it

Galatians 6:2 "Bear one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ."

You can talk to someone about it. Someone older, someone your age, someone at home or at school or from camp. A believer. We are called to listen to one another, and to care for one another. God didn't make us to go through these things alone, and there's no way we can bear everything on our own. We get to turn to each other for that, and, more importantly, we get to turn to Jesus. 

Psalm 55:22 "Cast your burden on the Lord, and he will sustain you; he will never permit the righteous to be moved."

Matthew 11:28-30 "Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light."

• I'm yearning to be known, to find someplace or something that feels like home and I just can't

Psalm 139:1 "O Lord, you have searched me and known me!"

College won't feel like your hometown because (in most cases) it isn't your hometown. I remember searching for a church that was exactly like my home church, and being disappointed when I couldn't find one. I grew up in a large church, and by the time I was a senior I knew nearly everybody. I had close friends that knew me, that knew my struggles and my favorite movies and my go-to cheesy jokes. But friendships like that take time to develop. They don't spring up overnight. The joy in the waiting is that despite how we feel or who we are surrounded by, we are known. God created each of us intricately and purposefully. So while we are working on those close friendships, we can rest in the Truth that the Creator of Heaven and Earth and everything in them, also created us, and looks at us and rejoices over us with gladness (Zephaniah 3:17).

These are some things I wish someone had taken the time to tell me my freshman year of college. And while I did have hard times that forced me to rely on the Lord, such sweet things came from it too. The girls I was open with about feeling alone are the same girls I'm closest to now. My go-to girls for movie nights, outfit advice, and combating lies that I still believe. We grew together through our hurts, and Jesus was so faithful to provide us with sweet community.